We all have the power to choose how we respond to life's situations. Those choices have consequences and our lives are the net result of all those choices. This section discusses the freedom we have to choose and the relationship between responsibility, accountability, and authority.
Plan of action
If you want to resolve issues with same-sex attraction, you need to develop a personal action plan considering the specific things you need. The issues are complex and differ from person to person. Your success depends on creating and following a personal plan of action. Topics covered: making a self-inventory, considering emotional and spiritual aspects, keeping balance, setting boundaries, monitoring progress, being accountable, journaling, and considering who you should tell (spouse, parents, siblings, children, friends).
There are many good books and websites that can help you understand your situation. The more you study, the more you are exposed to ideas that may help.
Support groups can help you by providing understanding and acceptance from others, and the encouragement to continue through the lengthy process. Topics covered: choosing a support group, joining a group, open and closed group formats, how to support each other in a group, confidentiality and anonymity, spirituality, safety, how to deal with sexual problems among group members, and how to find a support group.
For some men, sports was one of the things that separated them from other boys. Participation in an experiential sports program can teaches basic skills in a sport and provide opportunities to play the sport. Participants learn how to function on a team and have the chance to work through defensive detachment and face and resolve their fear of the sport.
Therapy can help you clarify your identity and make life choices that are consistent with your personal values. This section talks about modern therapeutic methods, gay-affirmative therapy, gender-affirmative therapy, choosing a therapist, the therapeutic process, professional ethics, individual therapy, group therapy, and what to do if therapy is not available to you.
Although you have same-sex attractions, you can choose your behavior and set personal boundaries on your actions. You may need to modify your habits and addictions because they can compromise your power to choose. Topics covered in this section include understanding your behavior, committing to change, habits, addictions, compulsions, personal boundaries, temptation, sin, suggestions for changing behavior patterns, setbacks, and specific suggestions regarding fantasy, pornography, masturbation, and homosexual behavior.
We are greatly influenced by our perception of our self and the world around us. Since these perceptions govern how we feel about ourselves and, ultimately, how we act, it is critical that we see ourselves for who we really are. When we better understand ourselves and expand our self-image, we expand the possibilities. This section discusses the concept of paradigms, then gives suggestions on how to improve your self-image and your feelings of self-worth.
Many men and women who experience same-sex attraction feel inadequate in their masculinity and femininity. How you feel about yourself is crucial because these inner feelings of being incomplete or inadequate can be a breeding ground for same-sex attraction. Those who experience same-sex attraction commonly experience feelings of inadequacy in their masculinity or femininity.
We all have emotions, but few of us know what to do about them. If you want to eliminate homosexual behavior and change your perception of yourself, what do you do with your emotions? Once we understand things intellectually, we need to accept them emotionally. We shouldn't be ruled by our emotions, but we also shouldn't deny they exist. Our emotional nature can become whole when we accept and understand our feelings, and deal with them in a healthy way.
Same-sex attraction often stems from relationship deficits and one of the keys to resolving it is to repair existing relationships and build new, healthy ones. Those who make the most progress in resolving their problems are those who build quality relationships with others of the same sex.
Many people who experience same-sex attraction are deeply spiritual. Satan recognizes this spiritual sensitivity and tries to use it against them. Tragically, their emotional needs are misdirected to same-sex feelings that divert them from developing higher levels of spirituality. To win this fight, you must be strong, have faith, and draw on the powers of heaven.
Living a righteous life does not mean that bad things will not happen to you. A common misbelief is that if we strive with all our might to live good lives, nothing bad will happen to us. But the truth is, bad things may happen to the best of people. "The Savior may not take away our problems, and he certainly will not shield us from all pain, but he will provide us perspective and strength to bear up under them."